When the goal is not to fit in
Let's face it, rejection sucks. It hurts whether it's a job you didn't get, a relationship that ended, or simply feeling like you don't fit in. Deep down, we all fear rejection because it makes us feel unlovable. This fear can come from all sorts of past experiences—maybe you faced bullying, discrimination, or even tough family situations.
But let’s just hold on here and don’t get too attached to whatever trauma it may or may not have caused; they don’t define your worth. This is not the point. It is learning how to reject it. You are more than the sum of your hardships.
Here are some symptoms you may have when facing rejection:
Low Self-Esteem
Depression
Anxiety
Anger
Resentment
Loneliness
Self-Doubt
Perfectionism
People-Pleasing
Coping with it
When we feel rejected, we often try to protect ourselves differently – that’s what the brain will do to feel somehow safe. Some people might put on a tough exterior, act like they don't care, or even lie to seem more impressive. Others might withdraw completely, feeling isolated and depressed. These are just ways our minds try to cope, but they can lead to more pain.
So, what's the solution? It’s Psychological Freedom. It's Authenticity. Being authentic means freeing yourself from the pressures of what others think you should be. It’s about letting go of those negative thoughts and unhealthy beliefs that hold you back. You don’t need that external validation when you have your back.
You must have a clear vision of what you’re looking for to have your back in your decisions. That’s why I created a FREE Notion Worksheet on Creative Vision to guide you through this clarity process.
Breaking the chain
We often get stuck in a fixed idea of who we are supposed to be. We tell ourselves stories about our identity that limit our potential. This narrow view can stop us from exploring new opportunities and growing as individuals.
You’re a blank page, and this idea can freak many people out. They don’t know what guidelines to follow anymore… “Who am I supposed to be?” I’m sorry, that's on you.
Give yourself permission to make mistakes and learn from them. Try to get small rejections every day. Talk to strangers. Ask for something in a restaurant they would never have on its menu (try salmon and quinoa at a Mexican Restaurant). Send a DM and never get replied. The most impactful and genuine interactions and creations come from vulnerability and authenticity. Be yourself, not who you think you should be.
"The better you are at communicating, negotiating, and handling rejection, the easier life will be." – Robert Kiyosaki
It takes courage to face your fears and insecurities, negotiate internally, and be willing to challenge and change your reality. You need to keep reflecting on yourself and commit to growing. While it can be challenging sometimes, the reward is a more fulfilling and free life where you can be yourself without worrying about what others think or your doubts holding you back.
